Still Standing, Still Praying: When You’ve Given All You Can

 Still Standing, Still Praying: When You’ve Given All You Can

💔 A Tired Heart, Still Trying

I’ve tried to stay strong. I’ve tried to stay hopeful. But if I’m being honest with you—and with myself—today, I’m just tired.
Every day feels like a mountain. Waking up, finding the strength to keep going, trying to figure out how to survive in a world that kept spinning after mine stopped… it’s overwhelming.

Since losing Mark, my heart has never quite returned to normal. He wasn’t just my husband. He was our provider, our rock, the one who helped carry me through my PTSD and anxiety when the world outside our door was too much to face.

Now, it’s just me and my son, Bryce, trying to pick up the pieces in a world that doesn’t slow down for grief.

🏚️ Why I Created the GoFundMe 

I created a GoFundMe because we’re falling behind on rent. Six months behind, actually. Our landlord has shown grace, but grace only stretches so far.

I’ve done everything I can from home—starting Flip videos, writing my grief journals, pouring every ounce of pain into something purposeful—but the bills don’t care how hard I’m trying. They just keep showing up.

The most recent one? Mark’s last hospital bill: $89,000. That alone was enough to knock the breath out of me.

And yet here I am.
Still trying.
Still pushing.
Still praying that someone will see me—not as a statistic, not as a burden, but as a real woman doing everything she can to survive.

⚠️ When Help Isn't Real

What’s been the hardest, though, is not just the silence from the world. It’s the scammers.
Messages that promise help if I just “click here,” or the ones that dangle money in front of me, only to pull it away.
I’ve had people say they’d donate and never show up.
Others pretending to care only to ask for things in return.

It’s cruel.
It’s heartbreaking.
And it makes me wonder if the world still has any room left for kindness.

🌱 Still Believing in Kindness

But I still believe it does.

Somewhere, there are real, genuine people who help without strings.
People who know what it’s like to struggle and don’t look away.
People who follow Christ, who believe in lifting up the weary, and who know that generosity isn’t just about money—it’s about mercy.

I’m praying those people find my story.
I’m praying someone out there will read this and say:
“She matters. Her son matters. Let me do what I can.”

💌 A Plea for Hope

I don’t need thousands.
I need hope.
I need a chance to breathe without the weight of overdue rent crushing my chest.
I need help catching up so I can keep creating the things that help others heal—even while I’m still healing too.

If you can give, thank you.
If you can share my GoFundMe, thank you.
If you can pray for me and Bryce, thank you.

Every act of kindness matters.

📍 GoFundMe – Secure a New Beginning for Dyan and Bryce

🕊️ I’m Still Here

I’m still standing.
Still hoping.
Still praying.

Even when it hurts.
Even when it’s hard.
Even when I feel like giving up.

Because I believe someone out there still cares.
I believe God is still with me.
And I believe that help is on the way.

🙏 Please, let it come soon.

With Love, 
Dyan

💜 Dyan's Grief Support Resources
🎥 [Watch my daily grief reflections on Flip]
📚 Explore my grief tools and comfort books
📖 Read my memoir Divine Light: A Memoir of Faith and Hope

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